'MacGyver' people, like most people, are not that excited about 'MacGruber'

For pure kitsch value, MacGyver is the gift that keeps on giving. The action adventure show, which aired on ABC from 1985 to 1992, birthed the handy catch phrase "I MacGyvered it," meaning, I used bubble gum and rubber bands to fix something. It launched a thousand fantasies for man-hungry Simpsons characters Patty and Selma (they love them some Richard Dean Anderson) and inspired a recurring Saturday Night Live skit, "MacGruber," that recently starred Charles Barkley and his "acting" skills. Now, though, a legal scuffle is starting between the original MacGyver rights holder—the creator of the TV series—and Relativity Media, which is preparing to open a big-screen MacGruber on April 23.

What's really so fantastic about 'Avatar'?

Before Avatar came out, a colleague of mine said, based on early buzz, that the movie sounded like "the Smurfs running around in the jungle." I laughed, but secretly hoped it was more complex than that. Then I saw it for myself. And it was worse than jungle-happy Smurfs. Its hackneyed plot and depthless characters, not to mention the overwhelmingly blasé graphics, were nearly too much for me to handle. At three hours or so, it was like watching the polish dry on my girlfriend's toenails. The question I left the theater asking myself was: Why did these avatars have to look so ridiculous and have such a complicated backstory? (Sigourney Weaver's avatar was dumpy and un-hot compared to the cougar she is in real life, for example.) Not to mention that the movie featured some truly talentless actors: Joel Moore (his delivery is like that of a high school janitor), Giovanni Ribisi (still think the only thing good he ever did was his turn on The X-Files as a lightning-tapping teen) and Wes Studi (the same-Native-American-in-every-movie guy). And now everyone's saying it's going to sweep the Oscars after a big night at the Golden Globes a few weeks back. Am I missing something here?

—Posted by Will Levith

Relive those glory years with 'The A-Team'

Ok, who's pumped for this? Come on, admit it. There are two things I can guarantee you about the big-screen version of The A-Team. It will probably be over-the-top cheesy. And I will definitely see it. I realize it has awful written all over it (like say the recent Knight Rider remake). But at first glance, the trailer (posted above) is so damn promising: They've got the voiceover! ("If you can find them …") They've got B.A.'s awesome van, the 2010 version! They've got Hannibal's hair, and his signature line ("I love it when a plan comes together"). They've got the cool guy from The Hangover. For me, back in 1983, as a 10-year-old, The A-Team was big stuff. Mr. T couldn't have been cooler. Stuff blew up every week. And no one ever died, no matter how many M-16s were fired. I have a distinct memory of a helicopter crash in one episode, where the two pilots just walked out like they were in a fender bender. I can't find it on YouTube. Actually, if you ever think of going back and watching classic clips of The A-Team, don't. The Honeymooners it ain't. The '80s cheese violence doesn't exactly age well. Your memories might be ruined. But the theme song is still awesome.

—Posted by Mike Shields

Edward's always been a sucker for Volvo

What drives beautiful, brooding vampire Edward Cullen? His eternal love for high schooler Bella Swan, of course. Oh, and his Volvo XC60. There may be some head-scratching over the promotional tie-in and sweepstakes between New Moon, the Twilight sequel opening Thursday night, and the European automaker. But one need look no further than the source material—the best-selling novels by Stephenie Meyer—to find that Volvo is one of the few brands mentioned by name in the books. Meyer, probably not wanting to date the material, steered so far away from brand shilling that Bella digs into vamp lore using "her favorite search engine," works at a mom-and-pop sporting goods store and favors grungy jeans and flannels over designer duds. In other words, no one would confuse the Twilight series with Cover Girl-sponsored Cathy's Book. Across more than 2,400 pages, there are fleeting mentions of brands like McDonald's and Monster Garage, but it's clear from the first book that Edward loves his Volvo. Vampire go fast! (And he buys Bella an Audi sports car to replace her beater truck, which frustrated him because it topped out at 50 mph.) Meyer, a confessed car nut, indulged that one passion—and obviously an obsession for human/undead romance—in the quadrilogy. New Moon, not incidentally, is tracking to be the top-grossing movie this weekend. Fandango reports that it's racked up the most advance ticket sales of any flick in the online service's history (that includes The Dark Knight and Star Wars: Episode III), and MovieTickets.com says it's outselling Twilight by four-to-one. Twihards, on your mark!

—Posted by T.L. Stanley

Michael Jackson leads the pack in banner year for tasteless Halloween costumes

Since Halloween is supposed to bring out the ghoul in us all, I guess it's no surprise that partygoers are planning to masquerade as dead celebrities this year. The high-profile recently departed from the worlds of music and TV seem to be the most popular, which means there will be lots of Michael Jacksons, Farrah Fawcetts, Billy Mays and Ed McMahons wandering around this weekend. Guess nobody's bothering to ask, "Too soon?" (Jackson, by the way, is the top costume choice in numerous polls.) Movie-ticketing service Fandango found in a survey that the much-anticipated concert film This Is It may be inspiring tons of Jackson wannabes, but Twilighters aren't far behind. (Neither is the comic-based Wolverine.) Trick-or-treaters will be drawing from movies based on graphic novels (Watchmen), toys (G.I. Joe), children's books (Where the Wild Things Are) and sleepers (Paul Blart: Mall Cop, The Hangover). Alice in Wonderland, Tim Burton's update of the acid-trip tale, doesn't launch until next spring but snagged the most write-in votes in Fandango's survey of more than 1,200 people. Media and pop culture continue to spawn the lion's share of dress-up ideas, like Kate Gosselin and her ridiculous hair-don't, the steamy True Blood vamps and President Obama. All I know is, I'd better not open my door to a blubbering Glenn Beck. No candy for him!

—Posted by T.L. Stanley

Who do they think will race to the theaters to see the new 'G.I. Joe'?

Growing up in the '80s, I developed a lifelong obsession with one of that decade's most beloved phenomena: G.I. Joe. I remember the blissful feeling of going to the toy store and using my allowance to buy an action figure. I owned the 3 ¾-inch action figures and their vehicles. I watched the cartoon. G.I. Joe played a big part in my young life. The G.I. Joe of today is a much different beast. A few years back I noticed Fox was airing a Saturday-morning cartoon called G.I. Joe: Sigma 6, a cheaply produced, CGI-ish version of what I used to watch on TV. More recently, I was shocked to see Hasbro launch a 25th-anniversary version of the action figures, charging a whopping $20 a pop for them. Maybe that's inflation. I doubt they've improved on the cheap plastic since the early days. And of course, since every piece of entertainment from my era has been turned into a movie lately, we are also getting G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, a potential blockbuster (or bust-buster ... i.e., too crappy to even screen for critics) coming to a theater near you. I've been excited about it despite reports that it could be Snakes on a Plane bad. The trailer above doesn't look terrible. But to whom, I wonder, were the moviemakers hoping to market it? Adults who had grown up on the '80s cartoon and action figures? Kids of this era, who know it in its crappy, computerized form? It's hard to tell just from the trailer, but I'd be surprised if G.I. Joe isn't a big hit and doesn't rekindle popularity in the original series, recession or not.

—Posted by Will Levith

Weinstein Co. appealing to the meathead market with 'Inglourious Basterds'

Try to find a more muscle-bound media plan than the one around Inglourious Basterds, Quentin Tarantino's kosher-porn flick coming out next month. Cases in point: A partnership with TNT for the premiere of Jerry Bruckheimer cop series Dark Blue, with a 90-second extended trailer and co-branded tune-in spots; a deal with Ultimate Fighting Championship that put the movie all over the Vegas venue where Brock Lesnar and Frank Mir battled it out a few weeks ago; and Tarantino and Brad Pitt plugging the World War II film at Spike TV's Guys Choice awards, a celebration of beer drinking, babe watching and head banging. There's an explanation for the meathead marketing. The Weinstein Co. is in desperate need of a hit and hopes to create one with the help of young action junkies. What better way to do that than position Basterds as a bloody late-summer adrenaline rush? Problem is, reviews are calling the movie "talky," with large stretches not in English. The Hollywood Reporter says, "For a war movie there is very little action." Sure would hate to be around when the testosterone set realizes they've been lured into a two-and-a-half-hour art-house flick.

—Posted by T.L. Stanley